Wayne Hedlund

Category: HEALTHY CHURCH

  • Tactical Tip: Saying Thank You Systematically

    Children know how to say the words ‘thank you’. Believe it or not, they even know when they are supposed to say them. But most parents know that expressing gratitude is not at the top of their list of things to do. Mom puts yet another meal on the table and rather than a ‘thank you’, the classic “eat your vegetables” battle ensues. Dad allows the kids to stay up late to watch a great movie and rather than a ‘thank you’, everyone just mosey’s on to bed when it’s over. Mom cleans up a messy bedroom and the child acts like he doesn’t even notice (he probably didn’t). That’s not to say that kids won’t say ‘thanks’ from time to time. No. Every once in a while it explodes from them like a burst of fresh sea air on a late afternoon day!

    We all know the importance and value of gratefulness. In fact, the Bible is full of verses exhorting us to thank God Himself in all things. Paul declares in 2 Timothy 3 that ungratefulness represents a quality of ‘terrible times in the last days’. Unfortunately, and like our children, expressing gratitude is often not at the top of our list of things to do!

    So in today’s Tactical Tip I am going to suggest a simple SYSTEM that will give gratitude a more prominent place in your regular routine. This system shouldn’t represent everything you do to thank your leaders and volunteers, but it’s probably more than you’re doing right now!

    The Thank You System
    To begin, you will need to collect a few resources. I suggest you add these to your shopping list right away or ask your spouse, secretary, or a volunteer to pick them up for you this week. Here’s what you will need: 

    • Four $40 gift cards.
    • A small notebook. 
    • Thirty stamped ‘Thank You’ cards.
    Now you are ready to begin. Follow these steps to setup your ‘Thank You System’. This should take you no more than 15 minutes to complete.
    • Place one gift card into four separate ‘Thank You’ cards and wrap a rubber band around them. Place a sticky note on the wrapped bundle that says “Gift Cards”.
    • Write at the top of the first page of the small notebook the words, “Thank You Log”.
    • Place the stack of ‘Thank You’ cards, the bundle of ‘Thank You’ cards including the gift cards, and the small notebook in a convenient location near, in or on the desk in your office.
    • Create a recurring reminder using your reminder system (if you don’t have a reminder system, then check out: Tactical Tip: Reminder Calendar) to send you a reminder every OTHER Monday morning at 9am or pick the day/time of your choice. I recommend a reminder no less than once every 14 days. Your reminder should say: “Write a Thank You card TODAY!”
    • Create another recurring reminder using your reminder system to send you a reminder once every 3 months to send a Thank You card with enclosed gift card. Your reminder should say: “Write and send a Thank You card with Gift Card TODAY!”
    • Create one last recurring reminder using your reminder system to send you a reminder once every YEAR beginning 11 months from now. Your reminder should say: “Evaluate and Setup your ‘Reminder Thank You’ system for this upcoming year.”
    You’re all finished! Your ‘Thank You’ Reminder System is now in place. Here is how the system will serve you:
    • When you receive your ‘Thank You’ reminder, STOP whatever you are doing or schedule a slot THAT DAY to follow up on this important task.
    • Stop and think of which leader or volunteer you want to encourage that week. Pull out your ‘Thank You Log’ and look down the list of names written there. Make sure you don’t pick someone you’ve already sent a card to, unless you specifically want to. Ensure you aren’t just thinking of the ‘obvious’ people all of the time.
    • Once you’ve decided on a person, write their name in the ‘Thank You Log’.
    • Write a heartfelt and meaningful ‘Thank You’, address and mail.
    Follow those same steps when you receive the quarterly ‘Thank You’ reminder including the gift card. When you receive the annual reminder, evaluate and revise your system as needed, shop for the next year’s ‘Thank You’ cards and gift cards and set them aside for when you run out of your current supplies. I suggest you use a different ‘Thank You’ card each year.
     
    If you decide to adopt this system or one like it, do me a favor – send me a ‘thank you’ via email at transformingleader@elimfellowship.org. I would love to know that this Tactical Tip has served you and your church! “Thanks!”

  • Love Your Sound Tech As Yourself

    There is someone else on the stage. You can’t see him, but he’s not invisible. His presence rolls of the stage in waves – sound-waves. He lives in a world of high’s, mid’s and low’s – and no, he’s probably not manic-depressive. When he’s ‘on’, you sound fabulous. When he’s ‘off’, you sound boomy, hollow, or possibly demented. He is either your hero or a villain.

    I’m talking about your sound man (or woman). Pixar did a superb job of catching the essence and challenge sound tech’s (and pastors) face every Sunday in this short clip. For copyright reasons, I am only showing you the first 2 minutes. Enjoy.

    [su_vimeo url=”https://vimeo.com/33231695″][vimeo 42830604][/su_vimeo]

    Love Your Sound Tech As Yourself
    All kidding aside, your sound tech is a very important part of the Sunday morning experience. He probably knows things about sound that you don’t , and even if that isn’t true . . . well, he’s back there and you’re up here, right?

    It seems that a lot of pastors and church leaders nurse a gnawing frustration when it comes to their sound tech. They never seem to ‘get it right’. It’s too loud, too soft, or just mixed weird. The microphone isn’t working again, the monitors hum distractedly, or you can’t hear the video as it’s playing on the screens. Overall, the relationship tends to be strained.

    I have a suggestion for you. Invest in your sound tech relationally. Ask he and his family over for dinner. Set up occasional meetings with him to just talk shop regarding the Sunday morning experience. Help him understand your values and preferences with sound. Cast your vision for ministry to him. Let him dream with you about the church and it’s future. Help him feel a part and extension of you every single week – after all, he is.

  • The Sunday Service Video Clip

     

    We all have unique preferences regarding how we like our food. Some like it bland, others spicy. Personally, I like my food to have a lot of flavor and spices whenever possible. Everyone who eats with me is pretty used to hearing, “Pass the salt and pepper please.”

    I would like to introduce a couple of websites that can and will add some ‘spice’ to your Sunday morning experience. These clips usually range in price from $5 – $20. Despite the minor expense, they will often help bridge the gap between a good and great Sunday morning experience.

    I highly recommend you check them out today!

  • Sunday Morning Announcements

     
     

    Remember our friend, Charlie Brown from the Peanuts comic strips and cartoons? You probably do, and you probably remember how realistic the sound of the school teacher was during those old fashioned episodes . . . “Wah, wa, wha, wha, wah, waah, wa, wah, whaa, wha, whah, wah.” Wow. Just quoting it reminds me of Jr. High History Class all over again.

    Question. Is that what your congregation hears during the Sunday Morning Announcements? I hope not. The announcements usually get a bum rap. Just for kicks, check off how many of the following are true at your church:

    • You traditionally have more than 3 announcements each week, often 5 or more.
    • You decide what will be announced early Sunday morning.
    • The emcee reads most of the information to the congregation; usually that’s also the first time they’ve personally seen or thought about the announcements themselves.
    • Each announcement is nothing more than a regurgitation of what’s already in the bulletin – a lot of basic information like who, what, when, and where.
    • The emcee sounds like my Jr. High History Teacher.
    • There are no slides or images displayed during each announcement.
    • There ARE slides during each announcement and your 5th grader could have done a better job.
    • The announcements average 5 minutes or more, sometimes up to 10 minutes.
    • The content of each announcement often doesn’t include how to sign up or get more involved.
    • You don’t plan to attend most of what is announced, or you wish you didn’t have to.
    I could go on, as I’m sure you can. I can honestly say that we’ve fallen into every one of these traps at some point or another at Elim Gospel Church. How about you?
     
    Question. What can you do different THIS WEEK to change those patterns? Here are a few random suggestions:
    • Sell Your Announcements.
      If you think it’s important to say, then don’t just say it, SELL IT! The whole point of the announcement is to give people a reason to care. Focus on WHY they should participate, not when and where it’s happening.
       
    • Information is Overrated.
      Seriously. Your people are pretty smart. Most of them know how to read. If it’s in the bulletin or on your website, then point them there to get all the nitty gritty details. When was the last time you saw someone pulling out their pen and writing all the information in their calendar on the edge of their seats during the announcement anyway?
       
    • Find a Good Talker to Do the Talking.
      If you’re going to sell your announcements, then find someone who can and will be passionate about selling them. Monotone is so NOT in.
       
    • Announce Something, Not Everything.
      Ideally, you’ll only highlight 2-3 key activities. I know this means you just might offend your ministry directors – that’s OK. They’re not serving as leaders for themselves, but for the church, right? Right?
       
    • Follow the 4 Minute Rule . . . (wait, I mean 3 minute)
      Make a rule of thumb that you’ll never spend more than 4 minutes on announcements. Offer your emcee a bonus if they can communicate them effectively in 3 minutes. Not possible? Give it a try.
       
    • Create Standards on ‘What’ Will Be Announced
      Not all of your church activities carry the same weight. I recommend you reserve verbal announcements for events that will apply to a large portion of those present in the room OR to people who are still new to your church and may not be sure what their next steps should be.
       
    • Decide on Announcements Ahead of Time
      One of the ways to keep your announcements focused and intentional is to decide ahead of time exactly WHAT will be announced. For instance, is it  possible for you to think through and decide on Sunday announcements for each week a month in advance? You’d be shocked how effective this method can be in clarifying what you will announce, when, and how often.
       
    • Prepare, Prepare, Prepare.
      Your emcee should prepare in advance. Ideally, he or she will know a day or two ahead of time and will PRACTICE communicating the announcements in privacy or in front of a captive audience.
       
    • Creative Announcements
      Mix things up every once in a while with a creative announcement. This doesn’t have to take a lot of time, but will still add value to the service and give people something to talk about. For example, one Sunday we had two men drive into the sanctuary in a golf cart and tee up for a shot to announce our upcoming EGC Open Golf Tournament.
       
    • Video Announcements
      Every once in a while someone will mention to me that video announcements are reserved only for large churches. I have to disagree. You probably already own enough equipment to put together some basic video announcements. (My phone even has High Def Video capabilities.) There are two teens at our church right now who have taught themselves how to edit video’s. One of those teens has created video announcements for the teen program on occasion. Video Announcements can be a simple way to mix things up in your service and ensure your church activities get the attention and focus they need. See below for a few examples of some standard video announcements at EGC. (Note: Our video editor is a professional. You’re VA’s may not look quite as polished as these, at least at first. That said, Dave Bode learned a lot of what he knows about video editing by creating video’s for our church.)

    https://youtu.be/R_n-2o1fa6E

    https://youtu.be/ItcR5f8E0G8

    https://youtu.be/Kt2bxdcn8xs

    https://youtu.be/yWE1_UNYC2w

  • Hosting Great Services

     

    Perhaps you’ve had the unfortunate experience of attending a church service that was a major flop. Let me describe for you what I would define as a ‘flop’. People are unprepared, there are a myriad of distractions, and there doesn’t seem to be any sense of the Presence of God throughout the meeting. That’s not to say that the Lord isn’t/wasn’t speaking. We all are quite aware that He can and will speak whenever and however He wants. That said, we are also aware that God has entrusted to His people to be facilitators and instruments of His words (more on that later).

    This month I will begin unpacking key ideas and principles regarding the Sunday morning services. As Executive Pastor at Elim Gospel Church it has been one of my primary roles to ensure the Sunday experience shines with excellence and that everyone works in tandem to accomplish the mission God sets for us each week. I look forward to unpacking what I’ve learned in upcoming weeks, so stay tuned!

    Additionally, I invite you to consider purchasing the “Hosting Exceptional Sunday Services” workshop by going to the Transforming Leader store. This workshop summarizes the 6 key elements of a Sunday Service and, more importantly, how to pull them all together to form an Exceptional Sunday Service. The workshop includes several additional resources and is available for purchase on CD or as a download. Click here to purchase the workshop today.

  • Lego’s And the People Connection

     

    You and I are kind of like a Lego. That’s right, the little toys that we all played with when we were kids. I sort of ‘borrowed’ this concept from Larry Osborne’s book, “Sticky Church“.

    So we all have some of those little connectors. Some of us have a whole bunch of them and others have just a few. The connectors are there for a purpose. They represent the number of PEOPLE with whom we have the time, energy, and emotional bandwidth to connect with outside our immediate family. They represent friendships. Not the superficial kind. The friends that you have or are growing to trust. You spend time with them and communicate regularly. If you’re going through a tough time, they will likely be the ones you talk to for encouragement and support.

    As Larry has so aptly pointed out in ‘Sticky Church‘, there are several problems with this scenario, especially as it relates to the church world. I’d like to explore some of them with you here. First, let’s define the most common types of ‘Lego’s’ in our church:

    • The Lonely Lego.
      I am pretty confident that most churches have more Lonely Lego’s than they realize. The Lonely Lego doesn’t have anyone connected to his connectors. He {or she} probably looks like he has friends, but the reality is that all of his friendships are superficial for one reason or another. If you were able to get him to honestly assess his friendship status, he would confess that he is genuinely lonely. Let me reiterate this one point about MOST Lonely Lego’s – they are usually NOT obvious. I’ve heard many stories about longstanding members who outwardly seem connected, but actually are not. I suspect a lot of Lonely Lego’s have unknowingly built emotional or physical barriers around themselves that greatly hinder the development of meaningful relationships. For example, he may be trying to find the ‘perfect’ friend, he may be too busy, or he may have convinced himself that nobody wants to be his friend.
    • The Full Lego.
      The Full Lego usually has the opposite problem. All of her connectors are full. She has developed several friendships either within or outside the church and she doesn’t have any remaining emotional or physical capacity to develop any others. Often, these people are quite content with their relationships and have no interest or desire in pursuing others. Several years ago an old friend of mine moved back into the area. I had been connected to this friend when he lived in the area more than a decade earlier. Upon his return I discovered my ‘connectors’ were already full. This created some tension between us since he assumed we would continue our friendship as it had left off.
    • The Open Lego.
      On occasion you’ll have people in your church who have been around for a while and who, for one reason or another, have a couple of connectors available. Perhaps one of her friends has recently moved away or maybe she has just entered a new phase of life allowing her more emotional bandwidth for relationships than in the past. Sometimes it can be obvious to an observer when someone has transitioned from a Full Lego to an Open Lego.
    • The New Lego.
      The New Lego represents the individual in your church who has only recently begun attending. He is often a guest or someone who has chosen to make your church his place of worship within the past year. Usually, the New Lego has a few available connectors and are hopeful that he will discover new friendships at church. Often, he is sorely disappointed. Nearly everyone he meets either SEEMS connected (Lonely Lego’s) or literally ARE connected (Full Lego’s). So he sticks around for a while until he finally decides to try filling his connectors elsewhere. ‘Elsewhere’ often ends up being among his unchurched relationships or at another church entirely.
    I’m not going to attempt to postulate what percentage of each Lego type you have in your church; however, I am fairly confident that this “Lego” illustration clearly defines a genuine problem for you. The lonely aren’t getting any less lonely and your guests eventually walk out the back door looking for friends they couldn’t find at your church. I’m not going to offer solutions here, but I WOULD like to take the Lego analogy a little farther to see where it might lead in your thinking.
     
    So, Your Options May Include:
    • Connect New Lego’s with other New Lego’s.
      This is probably the most obvious solution, but one which we often don’t think to do. If you can find ways to help your guests and newer attendees to connect with others who are also in that scenario, then it seems more likely they’ll find someone who has open ‘connectors’. EXAMPLE: Offer a Welcome Lunch & an eight week Small Group for Guests.
    • Connect Open or Lonely Lego’s with New Lego’s.
      If it becomes clear that a member has open connectors, consider finding ways to encourage relationships with newer attendees as well. EXAMPLE: Ask the member to lead/host a small group which includes several guests.
    • Connect Full Lego’s with New Lego’s.
      This can be a more difficult option, but is still worth considering. Often your Full Lego’s are some of your best leaders and most friendly people in the church. Usually, many of them possess a high loyalty to the church and are firmly rooted in the church’s DNA. Might there be a way to help New Lego’s build connections by utilizing Full Lego’s? EXAMPLE: Ask your members to consider leading a small group for guests once a year. Ensure that they understand that you aren’t expecting them to fill their already full Lego, but to step away from some of their longstanding relationships for a season in order to serve others in the church body.
    Your turn. What do you think? How else might this analogy help us re-think relationships and community in the local church?
     
    Disclosure of Material Connection: Some of the links in the post above are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will add value to my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

  • Guest Friendly or Seeker Sensitive

     
     

    It seems I’ve caused at least a minor stir among some of my readers regarding this past month’s “Guest Friendly” series. Evidently, some of you are getting the impression that I am actively promoting a particular model of church ministry labelled years ago by Bill Hybels as the ‘Seeker Sensitive Model’. I can understand how my most recent posts can come across that way.

    I’d like to bring clarity to that question here. To be blunt, clear, and concise: I am not suggesting your church adopt a “seeker sensitive” approach to ministry. Let me explain.

    SEEKER SENSITIVE: the seeker sensitive model which, until recently, was a key value at Willowcreek Community Church states that most aspects of the Sunday morning experience should be specifically catered to the unchurched or ‘seeker’. This means that the worship, announcements, special music and the preaching from the Word is primarily centered around the unbeliever.

    GUEST FRIENDLY: In my ‘guest friendly’ series I have been talking a lot about how to host your guests. I introduced new language like “Insiders Looking Out”, “Outsiders Looking In”, etc. in my post about adopting a ‘Guest Friendly Perspective’. I’ve encouraged you to view the Sunday morning experience, your parking lot, even your website through the eyes of the guest. If you’d like to read through the entire series, you may click on this link.

    Here’s the deal. I think it’s important that your church is guest-friendly. That means you are regularly thinking about your guests each week in some way. It means you don’t alienate them with your words or your attitude. It means you don’t drive them away simply because you WEREN’T thinking about them. Is that being ‘seeker-sensitive’? Technically, yes, but it is not a ‘Seeker-Sensitive Model’ of church ministry. It is simply common sense.

    Let me say that again . . . being ‘Guest Friendly’ is simply common sense. If you want to experience growth and desire the unchurched to not only darken your door, but come back again, it is critical that you figure out how to care for your guests. The only reason that I can see for a church to specifically choose to NOT be guest friendly would be because they just don’t want new people at church.

    Here’s the difference. In a Guest Friendly Church, your ministry will include and take into consideration the guests in your midst; but it won’t just focus on topics that are solely for the unbeliever. In a Guest Friendly Church, you will welcome guests, make them feel at home, and hopefully follow up with them; but you will also welcome your regular attendees, make them feel at home, and include them in every aspect of your Sunday experience. In a Guest Friendly Church, you may give some sort of evangelical call at the end of your message for those in the room who are ready to receive Christ’s amazing forgiveness; but it may come after a message that was on a totally different subject.

    A Seeker Sensitive Church will eventually alienate your committed members and mature believers. It communicates that the newbies and the unchurched are more important than they are. None of us want that.    What we DO want is for our committed members and mature believers to receive powerful, spirit-filled ministry every single week, equipping them to become a light for Christ in their communities and workplaces. What we PRAY FOR is that, as the light of Christ is spread into our communities, the needy, broken, and curious will show up to church one Sunday to see what this ‘God thing’ is all about.

    When that happens . . . will you be Guest Friendly?

  • Guest Friendly Signage

     

    A couple years ago we were evaluating the signage inside our church building. Understand, the signs had been posted for about 8 years before I took a real hard look at them. I was embarrassed to discover that one of our signs pointed people AWAY from the gradeschool rooms rather than TO them. Ugh. I wonder how many people got confused about that one.

    Despite this gross error, I can also say that we were still way ahead of the game compared to a lot of other churches. Many churches don’t even have signs. I guess they just assume people will figure out where to go, that they will ask someone, or perhaps that it should be obvious. Here’s a little hint for you – it’s not obvious. Another pointer – they don’t want to have to ask or try to figure it out themselves.

    If you don’t have signs in your building, no matter how small your church facility, then I would like to propose that you may be suffering from an “Insiders Looking In” or “Insiders Looking Out” perspective – both of which are dangerous to your church’s health and growth potential. Check out “Guest Friendly Perspective” to learn more about those malady’s.

    Here are a few simple pointers for church signage. Don’t worry, this isn’t rocket science.

    OUTSIDE:

    • Clearly Post Your Church Name Outside
      Seems obvious, huh? Yes, it is, and I’ve driven by churches that weren’t clearly labelled. Oh, there usually is a sign of some sorts, but they are sometimes small, hard to read, or in an inconvenient location while driving by. Ideally, drivers will see your sign at least 5 seconds before they have to brake to turn into your driveway, especially if your church is on a busy road with speedy traffic.
    • Make It Look Nice.
      Besides being easy to read, it should also represent your values to your community (along with the rest of your building). The drive-by is a critical part of your testimony to the community. If you were an unchurched person or new to the community, would you think your church seemed like a welcoming place when you drive by? Believe it or not, people DO occasionally attend church ‘on the fly’ while they drive by on a Sunday morning.
    • Clearly Mark Driveways, Entrances, and Exits.
      Do you have more than one driveway? Make sure they are clearly marked as entrances (or exits) to the parking area. Is it unclear as to which doorway is the main door to your church lobby or foyer? Place a sign over the door. Assume nothing. Take an “Outsider Looking Out” perspective – check out the signs Walmart posts outside and inside their store to lead people to where they want to go. How might that apply to you?

    INSIDE
    • Get Some Signs.
      I need to make this clear first. If you don’t have even a few signs in your building, arrange to get some. You may never notice them, but they will serve your guests very well.
    • Simple is Good.
      You may choose to get extremely creative with your signs – which is fine, but make sure the actual text and directional arrows are easy to read. In the case of signs, functionality is more important than creativity.
    • Don’t Hide Them.
      You’ll want your indoor signs to be placed on walls or areas that are high traffic. The temptation sometimes is to place them in odd areas in order to make room for other things on the walls. Be careful with that. Even though most of your attendees won’t need the signs after the first few visits, you still need to be ready to serve your guests well. What I have discovered is that hidden signs tend to, well, stay hidden.
    • State the Obvious.
      Another temptation is to not post what seems obvious to you. It may be obvious that the big wooden double doors lead into the sanctuary, but don’t assume it will be obvious for someone who has, perhaps, NEVER been in a church before.
    • Give Directions at the Main Entrance.
      It’s important that there are signs for all of the key areas of the church near the front entrance as people walk through those front doors. If a guest ever gets lost or confused, they will tend to make their way back to the entryway or lobby to get their bearings and figure out where to go next.
    • Lead People Through the Building.
      Ideally, you will have signs placed all throughout the building leading your guests to where they might want to go. For instance, if your cafe area is to the left, down the hall, to the right after the restrooms and then the second door down . . . you’ll want at least three signs. One pointing to the left from your foyer; one just after the restrooms pointing to the right; and one over the second door.
    • Post Destination Signs at Each Room.
      I recommend every door leading somewhere important have a sign associated with it. Again, most of your attendees won’t even notice or need the signs, but then again that’s not who they are for. This includes a sign over the sanctuary doors, the fellowship hall, the kids classrooms and most importantly, the restrooms.

  • Guest Friendly Welcome

    Recently, my wife and I went out to eat together. With gift card in hand from a generous friend, we made our way to Applebee’s Restaurant. I can’t remember when we have ever had anything but a good experience at this restaurant. They do a great job of hosting their guests, from the parking lot, to the greeting at the door, to the food and all the way back out the door. I remember receiving food that was cold a long time ago. As soon as the waitress discovered what happened she leapt into action. The end result was a new plate of food, a coupon in hand, and a free meal. Instead of leaving frustrated, we left impressed.

    I think the church can learn a lot from Applebee’s. We can learn a lot from many businesses and organizations who go the extra mile to care for and prefer their guests. I’m sure you can name a few as well.

    How does the guest experience at your church compare? In particular, how welcome do your guests feel within 30 seconds of entering your building for the first time. How about the first 10 minutes? Do you tend to assume that they will feel comfortable and meet a friendly face simply because you do when you walk in every week? If so, then I recommend you check out the “Insider’s Looking Out” portion of this blog entry. The answer to these questions are critical to you and your church! If you would like a quick reminder as to ‘why’, please read Guest Friendly Philosophy. Let me say it another way: The guest’s first 10 minutes will play a huge role in whether they one day experience a God-sized transformation at your church.

    What Not To Do:
    Let me give you a few suggestions on what ‘not’ to do when guests attend your Sunday Service. Please note that my assumption is that many of your guests aren’t just people who grew up in the church since they were 6, but unchurched people (that is, they haven’t attended in years or ever).

    • Ignore Them.
      Seems sort of obvious, right? Yes, and it happens more than you realize. Most of your church attendees are in their own world on Sundays. They may be at church, but they are thinking mostly of themselves; not necessarily in a bad way, so much as in a distracted, non-focused way. They are looking to see if a friend has arrived, trying to get their kids taken care of, already engaged in conversation, or just trying to get to their seat. As a result, your guests could potentially arrive and be completely ignored simply because nobody is really thinking about them.
    • Assume They are First Time Guests.
      Depending on the size of your church, this could be a problem, especially if you tend to have a lot of guests each month, have experienced a lot of growth recently, or have a adult attendance of more than 100-150 per Sunday. We see someone we don’t know, walk up and shake their hand and ask, “Is this your first time here?” Unless this actually IS their first time here, you will have to backpedal. What if this is the 3rd time visiting? Maybe they showed up three months ago a couple of times and just came back today. Worse, what if they’ve been coming for several months off and on. I have known church leaders who asked that question, to discover the person had been attending for 3 years! Ouch. You just said, “You’ve never been here before and I’ve never noticed you, so that must mean you’re a newbie and need my help.” Much better to ask, “I’m not sure we’ve met before. How long have you been attending our church?”
    • Assume They Feel Comfortable.
      No matter how they appear outwardly, there is very likely some measure of anxiety internally. Some people will be visibly nervous while others may seem very comfortable. Either way, as a guest there will probably be anxiety. Will people judge me? Will they ask me personal questions? Are they going to embarrass me somehow? Am I dressed wrong? What should I expect? Your job is to help guests feel safe as soon as they walk through the doors and every minute after that.
    • Put Them on The Spot.
      Churches are notorious for this. I think we hope guests will feel special or somehow honored when we require them to wear name-tags, ask them to stand up and tell everyone their name or to raise their hands if they are new to the church. For most people, this alienates and embarrasses them. Your guest wants to come and experience the service without feeling obligated to commit themselves to your church and perhaps even God. Growing up I had to move around to different schools a lot. The worst day was always the first, when I would walk into the room and have to stand in front of a classroom of potential friends and enemies and pretend I was confident and glad to be there.
    • Assume They are Christians.
      I suspect this happens in some areas of the world than others – for instance, the Bible Belt. At any rate, often we will talk to our visitors as if they already know God. We’ll make Bible references, use christianeze talk, and look down on them when we discover they are ‘living in sin’. Leaders, greeters, ushers, church members should never make the mistake of making this assumption. Again, it smacks of an “Insider’s Looking Out” way of thinking.
    • Pressure Them to Come Back.
      Nobody wants to feel pressured or put on the spot – especially when it comes to new environments and spiritual things. I think it would send the wrong message to them if you asked them on their way out, “So will you be coming back next week?” That doesn’t mean you won’t follow up with them and encourage them to return! It just means you won’t put emotional pressure on them, making them feel guilty if they don’t commit to returning. (      I will write about “Guest Friendly Follow Up” soon.)
    I’ll assign some homework for you this week. You’ll like this one. Go on a date with your honey to Applebees, Olive Garden, or some other restaurant which you know does a good job of hosting their guests. Go ahead, it’s on me . . . well, not really. Ask yourself what you might consider doing different at your church based on that experience. Here are a few ideas to get you started:
    • Greet EVERYONE at the door with a warm smile and handshake, but give deference to guests when necessary.
    • Create a Guest Packet that you give to every guest. Include in the packet information about your church as well as something for free. A CD of a past message, a small book or a coupon to your local coffee shop.
    • When a guest has been identified, offer to show them around and help them get acclimated to your church environment. Perhaps even introduce them to a couple of people who might get along well with them.
    • Offer to sit with them or near them if possible. During the service, if they look confused or need help, do your best to take care of their needs without attracting attention to them.
    • Make a touch-point with them following the service. Let them know you are glad they came.
    • OK – I stated the obvious. What else comes to mind?

     

  • Guest Friendly Philosophy

    Does it seem wrong and self-centered to you when people talk about attendance numbers at church? Do you feel like a hypocrite if you think to yourself that you’d like to see your church grow numerically? Is your perspective one that says, “As long as our people are maturing and growing in God, that is enough.”?

    If your answer to any of those question is “yes”, then it’s quite possible that creating a ‘Guest Friendly’ environment at your church also seems like a waste of your time and energy. I would like to tackle a more philosophical aspect of church growth by, again, asking the question, “Why?” As leaders we need to have a firm and clear understanding why we do everything we do at our churches. This includes the topic I’m addressing this month – “Guest Friendly Churches”. Why does your church need to foster a ‘Guest Friendly‘ environment? Why is it important to have a guest friendly website? Why should you spend the extra money and time to invest in good advertising and guest follow up?

    Why? Good question. Here’s the simple answer:

    Because you have something (actually Someone) to give to others that can change their lives. 

    That’s it. Question answered. You didn’t think it would be that simple, did you. It is.

    The reason why we should desire to see new faces in our church, numbers increasing in the pews, and more and more guests attending and staying every week is because we believe in the mission of our church. We believe God is doing something special; that He is transforming lives. The thought of people driving by our church every Sunday who are missing out on the freedom, purpose, and life that we experience in Christ should be plenty motivation for us to find ways to draw them in. We shouldn’t want to keep for ourselves the knowledge that people are discovering God, getting set free from addictions, being reconciled in their relationships with their children or spouses, and perhaps experiencing the power of God in some unique way every week.

    That’s exciting and it’s motivating. It’s also the primary motivation for ‘why’ people in your church will invite their family, friends, co-workers, and neighbors to church. However, this assumes a couple of things about the Sunday morning experience at your church:

    • People are experiencing transformation at your church. Obviously, if you don’t have something (or Someone) valuable to offer your community then it’s not only anticlimactic for them to come, it’s demotivating for them to want to seek God. The fact is that most of your first time guests are seeking God in some meaningful way – whether they are already believers or not. If they took the time to visit your church then the unspoken hope is that they will find Him there.
    • The Sunday morning experience is ‘Guest Friendly’.A while back I was placed in charge of watching two of our young children while my wife was away all day running errands. Sadly, I didn’t do a very good job of cleaning up after them. After about three hours the house was totally trashed. Later that afternoon I was talking to a good friend on the phone and the thought occurred to me, “Should I invite him to pop over to continue our discussion?” One look around the house was all I needed to answer that question. I had no desire to invite a guest into my home when it was such a big mess. The same will be true for your congregation. Many won’t invite others to church simply because they don’t believe the church experience is really ready for guests. It’s not ‘Guest Friendly‘.